Thursday, June 29, 2006

Reader poll

You know, sometimes I wonder about really stupid things. Lately, I've been wondering why there are no reality shows for writers. Think about it. There could be "America's Next Top Poet" or "Who Wants to Marry a Middling Novelist", "Battle of the Chicklit Stars." People think "Survivor" is cutthroat but have they ever been to a writer's workshop? This could be some seriously good TV.

So why no writing-related shows? Are books not lowbrow enough for the reality TV crowd? Is reading passe? Then it hit me. People don't think writers are sexy. The reality TV audience is only interested in one thing: hot, sexy, young people parading around half-naked, wrestling in mud, and eating slugs. (I'm talking to you, Fear Factor.) No one wants to see Stephen King in a thong or Joyce Carol Oates strutting down the runway in a sequined bra and stilettos. (Unless that sort of thing is your bag, which is a whole other issue.)

What I want to know is, why don't people think writers can be sexy? I for one have serious writer crushes on Steve Almond and Chuck Palahniuk. (No comments on my taste, please.) Is this weird? Am I crazy for thinking that writers are hot? I can't be the only one.

So tell me, who are your writer crushes? What about them or their writing do you like? Are they established writers or up-and-comers or complete unknowns? Do you crush on other bloggers, or would that just be weird? Who is your favorite guilty pleasure writer? Who are you afraid to admit you read?
Comment anonymously if you have to but somebody back me up on this one. In the meantime, I'll be watching Fear Factor reruns, trying not to picture Stephen King in a thong.


Anonymous Jim said...

Are 'writer crush' and 'fanboy/fangirl' the same thing here?

6/29/2006 2:30 PM  
Blogger Writing Blind said...

Um...when I think of fanboys I think of people dressed in full Star Trek regalia for some reason so no, I don't think that's what I'm going for here. Certain writers make me swoon, both on the page and off and I'm just wondering if anyone else agrees, that's all. What is a fanboy anyway?

6/29/2006 3:31 PM  
Blogger Scott said...

I like Jhumpa Lahiri, at least from her picture. My son's kindergarten teacher has a daughter that was just on a reality tv show. You got that right, she was outlandishly gorgeous.

6/29/2006 3:37 PM  
Anonymous fringes said...

I have a crush on two bloggers. One visits my blog erratically and never ever comments. The other visits but only speaks when spoken to.

6/29/2006 4:18 PM  
Blogger Justin Evans said...

You know, I have actually never gone for the writer type. On top of that, I really don't know many women writers by appearances. I always thought Tess Gallagher was very pretty, and I suppose Sylvia Plath was pretty.

I am embarrassed to say that I once wrote a poem about a woman poet I found attractive---but I can't think of her name right now to save my life---the poem is only a year old.

Then again, you have not provided a picture of yourself, which makes it impossible to say with any accuracy if you are my type, physically speaking.

6/29/2006 4:19 PM  
Blogger Writing Blind said...

Scott, she is gorgeous, I agree. And her writing isn't half-bad either.

Fringes, I think I know who the first one is but you've lost me on the second one.

Justin, I don't know if it's even the writer type I go for. I like Steve Almond because he's a good writer and sort of a badass and I like Chuck Palahniuk because he's also a good writer and I seem to have a hopeless attraction to gay men for some reason. Go figure.

As for blogcrushes, I too have a few but I won't name names cause frankly I think that is kind of weird. Suffice to say, they're listed in the sidebar so have fun figuring it out.

6/29/2006 4:34 PM  
Blogger Justin Evans said...

You know, when I was in high school, I would have acted gay if I had any idea how many women actually enjoy the company of gay men. That's how desperate I was back then. Not very punk rock of me, but probably the truth

6/29/2006 6:40 PM  
Blogger Writing Blind said...

LOL, it's so true, I wonder why that is. All my favorite singers are gay too. None of them are punk rock either so don't worry about it.

Oh, and the reason there's no picture of me is I want to attract people here, not drive them away. :P

6/29/2006 6:48 PM  
Blogger Quinn said...

Justin, when the girls think you're gay, and you're not, it's agony. I was on the girl's volleyball team (no guys volleyball in KS those days - don't think there is now either) my sophomore year and they all thought i was gay.

I honestly don't have a crush on any writers at the moment. although i did have a brief crush on Mako Yoshikawa who wrote "One Hundred and One Ways" and "Once Removed."

6/29/2006 7:01 PM  
Anonymous fringes said...

I can't give any more clues. Google cache lives forever.

As far as writer crushes, I tend to fall in love with the writing, not necessarily the writer. Physical appearance makes no difference if the prose is in all the yummy places.

6/29/2006 7:27 PM  
Blogger Writing Blind said...

Fringes, don't worry, I'll figure it out.

I agree with you about falling in love with the writing first. I would never read something because the writer was good-looking but I also think attractive prose makes the writer more attractive.

I also think a lot of books, some of them not very good, get marketed on the basis of the author's looks. Kaavya Viswanathan, for example. She was young, pretty. Her book was a big ole piece of fake-a-roni but it didn't really matter at the time. They were relying on her image to sell it.

I don't know, I sort of forgot what I was talking about after Quinn posted about being on a girls' volleyball team. Now all I can think about is short-shorts and knee socks.

6/29/2006 7:34 PM  
Blogger Orange Blossom Goddess (aka Heather) said...

What a fun train of thought!! I've never crushed on a writer before...not consciously anyway. As for other bloggers...I'm completely obsessed with checking (usually more than once a day) to see if anyone has posted something new...this goes for both my main blogs!

6/29/2006 7:43 PM  
Blogger Writing Blind said...

Well, you see Heather, I have no life. While other people are out scaling Everest and kayaking down the Amazon, I do this.

And I think a lot of us are obsessed with checking the blogs. That's how the Blogger minions suck you in.

6/29/2006 7:54 PM  
Blogger Scott said...

I think I would have blogger crushes if I weren't married. I've been "approached" on two occasions that I can think of, and each time I've let them down as best I could. It's not wierd exactly because I understand, which makes it wierd perhaps. I've never posted my picture, and I know how the imagination works--all by itself. I met one blogger friend of mine, Mr. Schprock. It was really cool, but we both agreed it was a bit surreal, like meeting a movie star. We weren't comparing ourselves to the stars, only in the experience of meeting someone you have looked up to for so long.

6/29/2006 10:21 PM  
Blogger in the loop said...

I was so relieved when I got to college and found out that other people in one of my lit classes--as well as our prof--had crushed on John Donne. Dead bloke. But yeah, I swooned over some of his poems.

Suffice it to say, it's the words I fall for, not the looks.

6/29/2006 11:24 PM  
Blogger Flood said...

Fringes, I saw that.

Rebecca, favourite guilty pleasure of all is Andrew Vachss. To me, his work is total brain candy. I found him when I was a kid through a book called, would you believe it, Flood. I was sure, before that, that my parents were insane, but to see my name on a book made me fall in love with the author and like my name a whole lot better.

I don't give away my last name on the blog, but I pay homage to Andrew Vachss in my email account, with "Vax"

Long way to tell you I would kiss on that guy for hours, no problem. He wears an eye patch! What's not to love! AND he wrote me back one time! Hooray!

Anyway, I maintain long-term crushes, with weekly crushes, with bloggers. If I visit your blog, I prolly have a crush on you.

6/30/2006 7:48 AM  
Blogger Writing Blind said...

Scott, see I think I would be totally weirded out to meet another blogger. I prefer the whole "Pay no attention to that man behind the curtain" sort of thing.

Livin on Main, welcome. If anyone here hasn't visited her blog, you should go now because she's writing some really good poetry over there.

Flood, I think that's a sign isn't it? Sort of a meant to be thing, eh? And yeah, eye patches are way hot. :)

6/30/2006 9:09 AM  
Anonymous Jim said...

Fanboy or fanboi is a term used to describe an individual (usually male, though the feminine version fangirl may be used for females) who is utterly devoted to a single subject or hobby, often to the point where it is considered an obsession. So, technically, Trekkies are fanboys(/girls), but they're an extreme version.

And given the comments spawned here since I left my initial comment, I'm gonna have to say that fanboy is definitely not what you were going for. I've got writers who I'm fanantical about - I collect every book and every collectible related to that authors works that my checkbook can handle - but none that I've ever had a crush on, per se. Same goes for bloggers - several I make sure to read on a daily basis, but no crushes.

6/30/2006 12:26 PM  
Blogger Writing Blind said...

Oh yeah, I'm not talking 'Fatal Attraction' here. I'm just interested in the dynamics between looks and readership, I guess. Really I just want to know if other people get moony crushes on writers they like or if it's just me.

6/30/2006 2:08 PM  
Blogger Susannah said...

I've always thought Paul Auster was rather sexy......

6/30/2006 3:38 PM  
Blogger Writing Blind said...

Susannah, hello. Paul Auster, hmmm. He has a very intimidating look, I think, but lovely eyes.

6/30/2006 3:58 PM  
Blogger Dave Clapper said...

My initial attraction to my girlfriend was absolutely because of her writing. And, aside from the fact that she's incredibly sexy anyway, her writing continues to be one of the things I fall for every day (I even have a very brief piece she wrote up on my blog now).

6/30/2006 8:11 PM  
Blogger Writing Blind said...

I just read it and I can totally see what the attraction is. Wow.

6/30/2006 8:25 PM  
Blogger Lynn said...

I would parade around half-naked and wrestle in mud on TV, but I would not eat slugs.

I have a mad crush on John Donne. Is that weird? And Linda Gregg was hot when she was young.

6/30/2006 10:47 PM  
Blogger Ceebie said...

It's not something I think about on a regular basis, but I'd say if I crushed on a poet/writer, it would be Pablo Neruda (after seeing Il Postino, actually...and then reading his love/scorned love poetry) and Gabriel Garcia Marquez (don't even know what he looks like but his writing has such depth). There's something about those Latin American men and their passion...

7/01/2006 7:16 AM  
Blogger Writing Blind said...

Lynn, not even one slug? A really little one?

Another vote for John Donne, perhaps I need to look into this. And I definitely need to watch Il Postino, I think I'm the only person on earth who hasn't seen that movie yet.

7/02/2006 8:12 AM  
Anonymous fringes said...

ceebie, garcia marquez is beautiful inside and out.

rebecca, add one more to my blogger secret list, please.

7/02/2006 9:57 AM  
Anonymous fringes said...

Secret blogger crush list, I mean. Sorry for the extra comment. My new crush is rubbing off on me already. ;)

7/02/2006 10:00 AM  
Blogger Chad Simpson said...

Fringes directed me this way after I mentioned in a comment on her blog that I have a major writerly crush on Claudia Smith, based solely on the way she writes.

Other crushes: Amy Hempel, whose writing I adore and who, based on her author photo, is gorgeous in a very Emmylou Harris kind of way; Heidi Julavits, based on her story "Marry the One who Gets There First"; and Raymond Carver.

I could probably mention a few hundred other writers and bloggers, but a guy's gotta have a little mystery.

7/02/2006 11:09 AM  
Blogger Writing Blind said...

Chad, welcome. I hadn't heard of Claudia Smith but I looked her up online and found some of her stories. She is really good.

And I absolutely love Amy Hempel as well. What that woman can do with a sentence, it's amazing.

7/02/2006 11:18 AM  

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