What I want

• I want hot chocolate on cold days.
• And an endless supply of marshmallows.
• I want to chase fireflies in the backyard like I did when I was little.
• I want to be a better writer.
• And a better friend.
• I want to stop being such a TV junkie. It really does rot your brain.
• I want the Yankees to win the World Series this year.
• I want to learn how to use my digital camera so that I can take halfway decent pictures.
• I want someone to think that my paintings are good.
• I want a job that I can love and that doesn't make me feel like less of a human being.
• And I wouldn't mind if it paid well too.
• Really, I want to be my own boss.
• I want everyone to laugh at my jokes.
• I want to learn to drive a stick.
• And a motorcycle.
• I want a king-sized bed, with down comforters and a high thread count.
• I want to read the classics.
• I want to learn to play an instrument. The piano, maybe, or the violin.
• I want to be happy in my own skin, even if that means not being a perfect size 6.
• And I want the rest of the world to think it's okay too.
• I want to write books. Then I want to publish them. Then I want people to read them and say "Oooh, how brilliant." Or something like that.
• I want to get unstuck.
• I want to be a rock star.
• Or at least marry one.
• I want to see the world.
• I want to go Europe and let myself get lost.
• I want to go to Vegas and lose a lot of money and not care.
• I want to go to Arizona and stand in the middle of the desert and scream as loud as I can.
• I want to go to New York City and stand in Times Square, knowing the city could swallow me up in an instant.
• I want to find someplace where I belong.
• I want someone to remind me what it feels like to be inexplicably, deliriously in love.
• But I'm not holding my breath.
• I want to buy a farm and live in the country, away from the rest of the world.
• I want to wake up in the morning and just be glad that I'm alive.
• I want to find some peace.
• I want to believe in God.
• I want to let go of my fears.
• I want to the war to be over.
• I want to feel safe in my own country.
• I want someone to tell me it's going to be alright.
• I want to believe this.
• I want to be able to tell my mom the truth when she asks if I'm okay.
• I want to be able to talk to my dad.
• I want to figure out what the hell it is I'm supposed to be doing.
• And more time to do it.
• I want to forgive people who have hurt me.
• And I want to be forgiven.
• I want to tell the truth.
• I want someone to hear me.
• I want to stop procrastinating.
• I want to get off my ass.
• I want to have a better attitude.
• I want to look on the bright side for once.
• I want to take myself seriously.
• And I want other people to do it too.
• I want to give back to the world, in some small way.
• I want to make every day count.
• I don't want to waste any more time.
• I want my life to matter.
• Mostly, I just want to be happy.